My Story

My Story was first shared on the Worth Living blog at worthliving.co

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I Stopped Fighting My Mental Illnesses.

 To everything (turn, turn, turn) There is a season (turn, turn, turn) And a time to every purpose, under heaven. A time of love, a time of hate. A time of war, a time of peace. A time you may embrace, a time to refrain from embracing.               From the song: Turn Turn Turn                                         By Pete Seeger Most of my life, as long as I can remember Mental Illness has wreaked havoc on my life. Depression, Anxiety, Emotion Regulation, Mood stabilization issues, Black and White Thinking, Self Medication, Rage. All this led to an inferior quality of life, broken relationships and a trail of human wreckage that spilled back decades. In the late 00’s after another “breakdown” and Suicide attempt, I got, as they say, “sick and tired of being sick and tired." I was ready to do whatever it took to get better. I decided I was going to fight this Mental Illness until I defeated it leaving me victorious over it. So with determination, I slowly and deliberat
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The Mask

The Mask That mask you wear. The lie on your face. The one that you think protects you. The one you think keeps you safe.  That mask is poison. That mask is the tool you use to lie to your family and friends. That mask you use to hide the true you, and that's the problem. You see what you think is helping keep the real you safe actually hides the real you from the light. It hides the real you from the truth. So the real you shrivels in the dark and wades in lies. The real you starts to buy the lie that the mask you wear is good and the real you needs to be hidden. Until the real you that has been forced behind the mask so often for so long no longer feels valuable to you. The mask is poison. The real you needs light to grow. The real you need light to heal. The real you is authentic there for beautiful. So I ask you. I beg you. Take the mask and break it. Throw it away and be you. Show you. Let the real you feel the light on your face. That mask
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A recent Letter

I think everyone should get letters like this! Dear Elliott, I wanted to recognize the hard work you have been doing recently.  I know that what may seem like a simple task for most can be very challenging for you. I know You have been through times in your life that pressed you so hard you only thought suicide would give you relief.  I know that you used to dread participating in the human experience. You cursed your body mind and soul. Now I see a new light in your face. You are fundamentally the same man, yet you smile now because you're happy not because you’re hiding.  Where you once looked at everything as a burden that had to be endured. Now you approach life as the amazing journey that is a reward in itself to live. Hope has replaced hopelessness. Courage has risen from the fear. The struggle has been met with determination. You have transformed the entire world the hidden and the seen. Congratulations! I want to remind you that you got to where you are because y
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